Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
