I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
