The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
how drunk are you?
Several
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
