can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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