I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
