Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
So here I am, sexting at work.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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