One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
