By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
