My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
