In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
