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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
