doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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