Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
