So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
