he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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