Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
