i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize