Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
that may or may not have been my penis.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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