Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
someone owes me an orgasm
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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