She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
