somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
