we have pet lesbian snakes
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
