no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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