Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
