Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Swine flu. Run for my life!
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
