If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
