Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
