I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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