Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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