TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
