Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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