One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
