i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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