Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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