im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize