I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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