What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize