Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
