I wannas sexs uuuuu
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
