found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
