You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
