I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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