Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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