just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize