At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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