Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
