Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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