That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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