Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
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