Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
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