I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Randomize
